For the purposes of getting my point across ill start backwards.
Firstly I am not a stingy person, I find myself to be very generous. Its something that comes naturally to me, For example, I dont know how many times Ive removed my new favorite jacket and given it to a friend because they liked it.
Now, saying that, I have just found out something about myself that seemingly contradicts this self professed generous behavior.
Im currently at sea on a ship, and I spend the majority of my time whilst at sea pooring over beatport finding new tracks. Over the last 2 weeks I have been training up a new Engineer to replace me, His name is Dimitri and he is very very Russian. So everyday he is asking me if I could give him some of this new music. Initially I gave him a couple of my mixes thinking this would make him happy. The next day he comes down with his 500GB hard drive asking for my whole collection....... At this point I have this overwelming feeling that I just dont want to... this isnt a jaket, this is my collection, I lot of time has gone into it. How many of these tracks I had to hunt down just from having a melody in my head and a few words from the chorus.
So I told Dimitri that I was in the process of sorting my tunes and id get back to him....
So everyday he is asking me for this music and everyday im making an excuse..... Where is this coming from? Dimitri is not a DJ, so he will never play my tracks in a DJ setting, Added to that, he lives in Russia... why am I feeling this apprehension, like a little kid who dosnt want to share his toys.
I personally take pride that everytrack in my collection I have paid for, Im not preaching, its just that Im in a position where I can afford to do so, and I feel in this case its inexcusable to pirate music.... Id like to think that this is where my apprehension is coming from, In support of the artists that created the music. But if I am trully honest with myself, this isnt where its coming from, I cant use a moral high ground as an excuse. Its plain and simple, Ive spent a lot of time with these tracks and I dont want to share it with anyone. If someone asks what track im playing, im more than happy to share. Maybe if a friend DJ wanted to swap a few tracks, again yes I would be willing, but be dammed if im going to hand over everything to anyone.
Maybe its selfish, I just found it interesting because its in stark contrast to my usual behavior.
So I have only a small playlist of Trance, maybe 20 tracks..... I just now tried to offload those to him, considering he is Eastern European I figure this will suffice, but my Russian friend is smart, he knows this isnt the music ive been playing, what he is referring to is all my latest tracks freshly downloaded from Beat-port. He has a habit of standing over my shoulder whilst im trying to relax,So In the end I give in and give to him my latest tracks....
I ask him not to give this to anyone else, I tell him these tracks are special. He must be thinking that I am very strange.
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