I really don't understand your problem, mate.
I though tthe problem was that where you HAVE made connections, the gigs just aren't there because people don't like the music you play. And where there ARE people that like the music you play, you haven't been able to make the connections and get the gigs that you want (or the town/city is too far away).
Either way, the solution to that problem is BE WHERE YOU need to be.
BUT - you are not able to move because of your posting. So, the solution to your problem is not in your power to grant to yourself.
Give up on DJ'ing? If it's something you love doing, how can the opinions of a bunch of strangers on a forum influence whether or not you continue doing it?So my question for you guys is do i just give up on it and move on to doing my life long dream of producing music, or suck it up and wait for the stars to align and get a gig.
Life long dream of producing music? If that's the case, why aren't you already doing it? There's TONS of free software that would allow you to get your feet wet and have a go at it.
I understand your problem - you're a very busy guy, and want to make the most efficient use of your free time. That's perfectly understandable. But, unfortunately, these decisions are not something that you should be sharing on a forum. They're hard, and you might have to try and fail at a couple of things before you REALLY understand what it is that you love doing, and then dedicate your precious free time to that.
Not sure what you expect from this thread. Not sure if I've helped you or frustrated you further.
Not even sure why I've just written all of that???