Humour: Things NOT to say while at a gig.
when given a request for a track- “I don’t go to your place of employment and tell u how to suck”
when the promoter is hot- “you can pay me with your body”
when the bouncer pats you down- “a little to the left… ah that’s the spot”
You might be coughing up teeth after the last one dude lol
I’ve said the first one, sort of: “Do I show up where you work and piss in the french fry cooker?”
mess with the promoter:
“you guys are gonna love my happy hardcore set!” ----said this at an electro event lol
Haha. I’m surprised anyone even remembers what that is. Such a short-lived delusion, no?
my preferred remark is; you could’ve bought me dinner first - tends to speed them up a bit
click train to derail thread
(though it is kind of related)
lol
and
and on payday ..
A few years ago at a downtown Orlando club we’ll not identify by name, a certain DJ actually got on the mic to address his half-full dance floor at around midnight or so with this absolute classic call to action:
“Dance, you faggots.”
I’d like to have seen a thought bubble over him for that one.
A couple of friends of mine once witnessed a Toronto DJ threatening the crowd with a 4-bar loop from Toxic (yes, the Britney hit) to dance or “THIS LOOP WON’T STOP”.
Classic.
Wait…you are in gville?
Two true experiences that will go in the chapter ‘Gay functions I have Done’ - when I write my memoirs.
One of these worked and one didn’t.
I was DJ’ing at a gay wedding - it was time to start the evening and about 75% of the guests were gay couple friends of the happy couple.
I started spouting some stuff over the mic and said ‘it’s time to start the evening in a traditional manner with a first dance for the groom and …er groom’.
This was well recieved unlike a comment I made at another function, again attended by a majority gay crowd organised as a surprise by a woman for her partner.
I again started the evening by putting my size 10’s in it, but saying ‘Welcome to (name of the woman’s) special night, before I go any further I’d just like to say that the guy standing behind me is in fact my Dad’ :eek:
A favourite I heard a DJ once say to a crowd of people that just wouldn’t dance no matter how hard he tried.
‘Listen…Everyone sitting down now - I want you to all join hands and we are going to see if we can contact the living’
our counter-attack: Go to a death metal rock show and say “hey, are they only going to play classic rock?”
classic…
Check this one out
^^^^^^^
" WHY DID YOU FEEL YOU HAD TO COME UP AND COACH ME ON WHAT TO DO? "
Classic… Stupid girl telling Kid Capri what to play.
this chick said to me, “can you play something I know from the radio?”
I said, “No, but that thing in the dash of your car can. Why don’t you go out there and try it out?”
Quality site!
@Dvls nice link. A few jewels in there